The magic of medicine
Once a month I have an hospital appointment with a podiatrist who tends to my trotters so skillfully that they are now in the best condition they have been for years. It's been a long process that at times has made me question the point of trying to save my foot from amputation. A few months ago when I was yet again on a course of antibiotics that was issued following the removal of a few pieces of bone and the subsequent pathology report sent to my GP I had decided that elective surgery was the road I wished to go down since it was inevitable that this would be the outcome in time. A consultation was arranged with a surgeon and I felt relieved that I was soon going to be free of the palaver of treatment. A quick flick of the scalpel and my foot would be able to heal without the need for more debilitating drugs and dressings. Then fate stepped in. For one reason or another I missed my appointment and the treatment had to continue . I was in a low place and ready to give up completely, but regardless of my vocal protestations the podiatrist kept on with her insistence that she hadn't given up on me. Ordinarily I would kick back at this but she never lectured me, she soaked up every last expletive that fell from my potty mouth, dried my tears with her chatty humour and entertained me with tales of her own life. I shall never look at Steak Tartare in the same way again. For this I cannot thank her enough. She saved my foot and she saved my life.
That's almost all that I have to report, except for Dorothy's bowels definitely being back to normal, demonstrated with the most enormous turd (she's on daily omelettes forever), a little political activism with a taxi driver (he needed setting straight) and a shopping order delivered by a new guy who I can only describe as hunky as fuck. I'm almost tempted to abstain from abstinence since he not only has the looks of Adonis, a beard but also has a Chihuhua. Maybe next time i'll greet him at the door with a bottle of chloroform.
If they do amputate your foot, could I have for nest Halloween please?
ReplyDeleteNext, of course. I am not a nest-builder.
DeleteTom, you may help yourself to any bodypart that happens to drop off.
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